Miss Inga feat. Dominika & La Camilla: Don’t Try To Steal My Limelight

Oh my.

Tim: This I predict, will somewhat polarise opinion, and I’m fairly sure I can guess where the majority would side.

Tim: But screw the majority, because I love this. I will happily confess that part of it may just be all the neon lights in the video (which is, let’s be honest, one of the gayest we’ve ever seen, and we’ve seen a lot of Le Kid so that’s saying something).

Tom: Oh my. It’s registering at 15.7 VP* according to my calculations.

*”Villagepeople”. It’s the SI unit for how camp a music video is.

Tim: Anyway, I like the beat, the chorus melody – I think the first line reminds me of something else but I don’t care – and this song’s just good fun, really.

Tom: It doesn’t half go on a bit though. Not sure quite why I’m so irritated by the track, but I am.

Tim: Oh. Well, one thing that’s definitely a bit weird: I think the vague idea of the song is that Dominika and La Dawn French —

Tom: Ooh, handbags.

Tom: Oh, come on, you’re saying you don’t see it?

Anyway, they’re saying they’re better than Miss Inga, and that sort of comes across in the video but you don’t really hear it in the lyrics unless you’re listening properly because the music takes all the attention. Except for the line ‘Miss Inga, you’re not a very good singer’, which stands out so blatantly you’d think he (yes, he) hates himself.

That dog looks slightly uncomfortable, though.

Tom: Well, wouldn’t you be?

T-Pain feat. Chris Brown – Best Love Song

They just trade ‘ehh’ sounds back at each other for eight bars.

Tom: T-Pain: master of autotune whose best work is probably with the Lonely Island singing I’m On A Boat; and Chris Brown, noted domestic abuser?

Brace yourself, Tim. This isn’t going to be fun.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbYHmlto21M

Tom: I don’t know what’s more laughable about this.

Tim: Ooh, well let’s list things and see what comes out on top.

Tom: The parts where they just trade ‘ehh’ sounds back at each other for eight bars?

Tim: The fact that it starts with two rounds of ‘nappyboy’?

Tom: The ‘cowabunga’?

Tim: The autotune that’s so thick it’s possible they’re just saying stuff monotonously and letting the computer do all the work?

Tom: The key change, after which they trade ‘ehh’ sounds again before a bizarre guitar breakdown and drum solo finishes the whole thing off?

Tim: Oh, good lord – yeah, actually, that wins.

Tom: I just… I’m not sure I have words for this one.

Tim: In that case I propose just one: tripe. Although part of me is tempted to suggest a variant of Poe’s Law.

The Lonely Island feat. Akon – I Just Had Sex

Great key change, or greatest key change?

Tom: I’m going to open this with a simple question, Tim: great key change, or greatest key change?

Tim: I think greatest, purely for the fact that it makes initially regretful girls incredibly happy that they gave themselves willingly to these appalling* stereotypes of men.

* Although sadly not entirely inaccurate.

Tom: Is that John McEnroe? Yes it is. Is that Jessica Alba? Yes it is.

Tim: And is that Serena off Gossip Girl? Yes it is.

Tom: By the time this appears on Europlop!, of course, everyone on the internet will already be singing along to this. There will be two hundred cover versions, thirty badly hashed together parody replies, and at least one version redone shot-for-shot using kittens.

Tim: And if the person who chooses to make the kitten video leaks an unfinished copy with only half the shots replaced we can all scream ‘YAY bestiality!’

Tom: Er… quite. Anyway. The Lonely Island have been a proper band for ages, not just ‘those guys off Saturday Night Live’ (and before that, ‘those guys off the internet’). One full album featuring a dozen guests; another on the way; and performances on MTV and the late night shows.

And here’s the thing: the music’s actually good. Well produced, catchy, and funny at the same time; I think, in the history of music, perhaps only Weird Al has managed that before them.

Saturday Flashback: Markoolio and Linda Bengtzing – Värsta Schlagern

A massive Take That to the whole Swedish pop music scene.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PcurPxlG0o4

Tim: This symbolises everything that is perfect about the music we love, although it’s in Swedish. The lyrics, when translated, are a massive Take That to the whole Swedish pop music scene. Thoughts?

Tom: Hahaha. This is Verka Seduchka all over again, isn’t it? Actually, no, this is the Swedish version of “The Winner’s Song“! There had better be a brutal key change on the way.

Tim: Oh yes, and the best thing is that the lyrics before it are “…and here comes the key change!”

Tom: Right. It’s a schlager version of “The Song That Goes Like This” from Spamalot, then!