Tim: This really, really, really should have been Sweden’s entry to Eurovision 2010.
Tom: It’s Womanizer by Britney Spears, isn’t it? When he started his vocals, I muttered “Superstar, where you from, how’s it going”. Decent choreography though, although he seems to forget where the audience is half way through.
Tim: Perhaps, but this is Melodifestivalen, Sweden’s (vastly superior) version of Your Country Needs You, so he just needs to remember where the camera is. Also, you need to wait ’til after the key change before you can properly judge the dancing.
Tom: Ah, he’s been to the George Sampson school of stage performance then. (Not Daz Sampson, thankfully.)
Tim: Apparently, ‘everybody does fire’ and it’s quite boring.
Tom: He’s got a point there. You know what else no-one’s doing? Raccoons. No-one ever unleashes a hundred ravenous raccoons to attack the singer on the key change.
Tim: True, although raccoons would probably poo everywhere. Just not practical.
Tom: Neither’s rigging up a power shower above the stage, but they manage that.
Tim: Ah, but he practically had to beg them to. (Really, he did.) He probably wouldn’t have been so enthusiastic about unleashing rabid animals to munch on him.
Tom: Not sure about these lyrics either. “You can call me manboy” sounds like an odd way of saying “I have learning difficulties”. Can I do that joke?
Tim: Yeah, why not.
Tom: Hmm.
Manboy, manboy,
You can call me manboy,
I don’t care, I’ll show you how to love.
I’m not an expert, but I’d guess most women would prefer ‘man’ over ‘boy’. There’s not a whole lot of ‘showing how to love’ when your entire experience of love is the Victoria’s Secret catalogue. Or, if you weren’t born in an 80s sitcom, the internet.
Tim: Well I think that’s it. He pretty much is only a boy (19), so he wants the man to shine though. And, after all, what better way is there to prove manliness than stand in the pouring rain?
Tom:Raccoons. Fighting raccoons.