Tim: Well? Where were you?
Tom: I’m not saying. By the way, don’t ask your mum why she’s got that smile on her face.
Tim: Already have done, actually – she said she’s still smirking from when you were trying to look seductive.
Tim: To be honest, it’s none of his business whatsoever where you were – he’s only asking because he broke up with you, immediately regretted it, and now demands to know your movements of the rest of the evening.
Tom: Well, that’s one of the creepiest second-person sentences I’ve ever read. And I’ve read Rule 34. (Obscure sci-fi literary reference ahoy!)
Tim: Yeah, so actually, don’t feel you have to answer him. Rude bastard. Also weird-looking as well, I think. Wow, get me being all judgmental.
Tom: I was about to say “he looks a little bit like you”, but I think I’ll keep that under my hat for now.
Tim: Hang on, just got to make a phone call.
Yep, she’s still laughing. Now, this is actually a rather good cover of Ankie Bagger’s late-1980s (and very late-1980s-sounding) hit, although it doesn’t contain the somewhat pointless key change of the original (pointless as it comes in about half a second before the song fades out). It’s got everything it needs to be a decent CLUB BANGER etc, and it also has the feeling in the vocals that lyrics like this demand, which almost comes as something of a surprise, really.
Tom: I didn’t have high hopes for this – I thought it’d be another generic club remix of an old song. In a way it is, but you’re right – the vocals do rescue it.
Tim: The song was also covered by Finnish ‘symphonic metal’ (apparently that’s a thing) band Nightwish a while ago as a B-side.
Tom: Symphonic metal is totally a thing. It’s also awesome. In small doses.
Tim: For some reason (and not the soon to be obvious one), that’s actually my favourite version, and so we shall all listen to it now. (If it really isn’t your thing, at least skip to 3:00 and give it fifteen seconds.)
Tom: Oh, that’s just… that’s just better. Although I did try to sing “You Give Love A Bad Name” to the introduction.