Tom: Did you hear about the Spotify “fake artists” controversy? If not, here’s a good article about it, and you’ll need it, because today we’re talking about one of those fake artists.
Tim: Okay, got that read. Let’s start.
Tom: I heard this playing over a café’s sound system, thought “huh, that’s not bad”, and then found that it wasn’t on Shazam or Spotify. Nor were the lyrics searchable. I got a lucky search on the title, found it, and yep: it’s one of the stock-music Epidemic Sound tracks that have been quietly creeping onto Spotify playlists, and which a Guardian reviewer described as “the most bizarrely nondescript music I’ve ever heard”.
Tom: And the word that comes to mind is: competent. There’s not anything here that’s wrong. The lyrics have a positive sentiment to them, but say basically nothing. The instrumentation does exactly what you’d expect it to at every point. The chorus is catchy. The middle eight is interesting.
Tim: It also sounds entirely ‘bargain basement CHVRCHES’, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing.
Tom: Oh good heavens, you’re right. It is very much Discount CHVRCHES. I hadn’t made that connection. Anyway, the question is: if this wasn’t “stock music”, would I think any better of it?
Tim: See, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with stock music at all – in fact, ten years after watching it I can still bring to mind a brilliant song used in a Skins episode, which after endless searching I have concluded was recorded purely for the episode and, sadly, chucked away. What a waste.