Tag: Hera Björk

Hera Björk – Queen of Effing Everything

“Hera’s launching a one-woman musical.”

Tim: Hera’s launching a one-woman musical.

Tom: That is bold. A one-woman show, maybe. But one person trying to do a musical show? I don’t know, I think that could be just awkward.

Tim: And I’ll leave it up to the promo blurb to describe how amazing it will probably be: “Hera Björk has a lot of titles; wife, mother, Eurovision diva, exceptional lover, teacher, go-getter and many more. She has so many titles that the only way to accurately describe her is to say that she´s the Queen of ‘Effing’ Everything.”

Tim: I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again: WHAT A WOMAN. Out being a talented diva every evening, in being a dutiful mother every day. She knows it, she wants the world to know it, and she’s put together a two hour show to make sure everyone does.

Tom: Maybe I’m being a bit too British and reserved — and I’m aware this is a bit hypocritical coming from someone with a YouTube channel — but I feel like a two-hour show about yourself is, perhaps, a bit much.

Tim: I’m not sure where this fits in the show – presumably at the beginning or the end – but whichever it is, it’s a great track to feature, and it’s clearly up there with all the musical greats. You’re The One That I Want, Singin’ In The Rain, I Dreamed A Dream, Queen of Effing Everything.

Tom: The thing is: it is actually a good pop song. I’ve got very few complaints about it.

Tim: Tom, tickets are less than £30 for a meet and greet after the show, and it’s this weekend, so can we go please please please? LOOK HOW MUCH FUN IT’LL BE.

Tom: You’re on your own for this one.

Saturday Flashback: Hera Björk – Someday

“A number of wonderful things here”

Tim: Almost time to start going through this year’s Eurovision rejects, but first let’s take a trip back to 2009. Hera herself may be Icelandic, but why not at least try for Denmark anyway?

Tom: This is the same Hera that you were so enthusiastic about. A lot to live up to.

Tom: That takes a long time — perhaps too long — to kick in, but it’s worth it when it does.

Tim: A number of wonderful things here – the way the backing singers appear with a level of gravitas that might be appropriate if the curtain wasn’t entirely transparent but as it is is entirely undeserved.

Tom: I actually burst out laughing at that. It’s like they’re stepping out of the back of a shop from the 1980s.

Tim: The catherine wheel that kicks off at the key change that gets out of control, keeps accelerating until it can’t give any more and just splurges out; and then the rest of it – the so, so ’00s dance beat that jumps in for the chorus —

Tom: I was quite surprised this was as late as 2009: if it wasn’t for the widescreen shot, I’d have placed this somewhere around ten years earlier.

Tim: — the aforementioned key change, and of course Hera herself. Oh, what a wonderful woman.

WHAT A WOMAN

Hera Björk feat. Haffi Haff – Feel The Love Tonight

Well, this has got to be good.

Tim: Eleven months ago we reviewed the 2010 Iceland Pride track and somewhat liked it; a little under ten months ago we reviewed a Hera Björk track and loved it more than anything else in the world. Now, we combine the two, with this year’s Iceland Pride track, sung by the delightful Ms Björk.

Tom: Well, this has got to be good.

Tim: You’d think, wouldn’t you?

Tom: Oh.

Tim: Let’s not mince words: it’s disappointing. Right from the start with the autotune on her voice, it’s very disappointing indeed.

Tom: Who’s this Haffi Haff bloke? Because he appears to have dragged Hera down to his level.

Tim: No one particularly special – had a few tunes out that aren’t really worth linking to – but yeah. I wasn’t expecting another Because You Can, of course I wasn’t, and I accept it has to have a proper clubby sound to it, but it’s just so generic.

Tom: Not even an operatic bridge? Really? This could be anyone singing.

Tim: It’s a shame – she has such a fantastic and capable voice, and it’s wasted on this Rihanna/Britney/Beyoncé/J-Lo/anyone soundalike.

Hera Björk – Because You Can

I WILL LEARN HOW TO FLY. AND MY GLOW WILL BE RELEASED.

Tim: THIS. IS. BRILLIANT. It’s the new single from the lady who did the also, but not quite as, excellent Je Ne Sais Quoi for Iceland at Eurovision this year. Stylistically, it’s not far removed from Malena Ernman with a mix of dance and opera (or that Charlotte Church track, come to think of it).

Tom: And it’s a style I very much like. When it finally kicks in properly, a minute in? That’s glorious.

Tim: The first few seconds remind me a bit of My Heart Will Go On. (Still love that song, don’t care what you say.)

Tom: Yes, well, we all have our crosses to bear.

Tim: The verses are great, and the final few notes in them as they build to the chorus are utterly fantastic. The bridge is entirely wonderful, the vocal and the instrumentation going unexpectedly yet perfectly together, and demonstrating one hell of a vocal range.

Tom: Couldn’t agree more.

Tim: And then there’s the chorus. And oh. Oh, boy. What a chorus it is. What a chorus.

“Take the chance you’ll never know”

YES. YES, HERA, I WILL. EVEN THOUGH I DON’T KNOW WHAT IT IS I WILL DO IT. BECAUSE YOU ARE USING THIS SONG TO TELL ME TO DO IT.

“Fly, release your inner glow”

I WILL LEARN HOW TO FLY. JUST FOR YOU, I WILL LEARN. AND MY GLOW WILL BE RELEASED.

Tom: …

Tim:

“There is no-one in your way, trust that you will be okay”

I WILL BE OKAY. YOU HAVE ASSURED ME, HERA, AND RIGHT NOW I TRUST YOU MORE THAN I TRUST ANYONE.

“Take a chance, take your future by the hand”

FUTURE! COME HERE! HERA HAS ORDERED IT AND SHE MUST BE OBEYED.

“Because you can.”

YES! YES I CAN! DAMMIT, I CAN DO ANYTHING! I LOVE YOU HERA. I REALLY REALLY LOVE YOU. THERE, I’VE SAID IT.

Tom: I’ll leave you two alone. Tim Jeffries there, ladies and gentlemen.